As a married woman and as a seamstress, I often get asked what I think is important or essential wedding advice for a successful celebration. For the most part, I think weddings should be unique and reflect the couple everyone is there for, but there are definitely a few things that help make the celebration loads easier.
1. Wedding Day Coordinator or Manager
This is and forever will be my primary response.
Not every wedding needs a Planner, but I do think every wedding should have a Coordinator. After all, if you’re planning a low-key, intimate day with less than 75 guests you can absolutely plan that yourself or choose to have a Planner take care of every detail. But whether it’s your Planner who will act as Coordinator or you hire someone just for that purpose, make sure you have one.
You don’t want to be trying to get dressed and ready while simultaneously having to tell people what goes where – and so on. Trust me. Having a Coordinator will allow you to relax and enjoy the day that is, after all…all about you! You’ll be able to enjoy every little detail and moment without feeling the need to fuss over any of it – which is exactly how it should be. (And if you’re in KC, I recommend looking for one via Wed KC.)
2. Vendors you vibe with*
This may seem silly or obvious, but I promise it’s not.
Look, it’s so easy while planning your wedding to feel pressured to check off boxes and make decisions quickly. But don’t let that lead you to book someone you’re not sold on. It’s okay to have a consultation and say ‘no thank you’ if you’re not sure! The best vendors will always understand and take no offense. After all, you will probably consider multiple venues, right? It’s okay to do the same with vendors. And if you’ve been in love with a vendor and have been following their work for ages but find that when you start inquiring and communicating with them something falls flat… trust your gut! It’s okay to love someone’s work but say ‘maybe they’re not right for me.‘
*This also applies to the dress. Get what you love and you’re 1000% sold on, if you’re struggling to decide, let yourself! Give yourself a little time, and then make a decision you’re confident in and happy with.
3. Practically appropriate details
Because maybe wearing stilettos when you’re getting married in a national park isn’t a great idea.
Before establishing my business in Kansas City, I lived and worked in northern California. In spite of being in the northernmost place I’d ever lived, the Sacramento Valley was definitely the hottest. (And I moved there from New Orleans.) Yet even with the intense heat, while working at a David’s Bridal I frequently saw brides choosing ballgowns and heavily embellished mermaid gowns for outdoor weddings. And I would sweat just thinking about it.
You may have dreamt of looking like Belle your entire life…but if you’re getting married in a barn in June… a ballgown isn’t a practical choice. And honestly, I could come up with an endless amount of examples; and while you have every right to make as many impractical choices as you like, they will inevitably make things cumbersome or awkward if not difficult. Some options may not even be a poor choice but aesthetically they might not make sense. (Like bridesmaids wearing cowgirl boots when you’re getting married in an art museum.)
And this definitely doesn’t just apply to your attire! You may love the idea of certain details, but make sure you’re considering your schedule, your location and venue, your date, and so on.
4. Easter eggs
Metaphorical ones, not the hollow plastic ones.
This is my fun way of saying include meaningful details, even if no one else notices them. The most sweet and special wedding celebrations are always the ones full of sentiment.
A tier of vanilla cake with raspberries because that was what your parent’s wedding cake was, peep-toed heels that look like what your grandmother wore on her wedding day, yellow roses in your bouquet because they were the in the first bouquet your future spouse ever gave you…. Make intentional choices and let your self be devilishly into the details. You don’t have to do big, grand or frivolous things for your day to be special and lovely.
5. A bustle
Maybe this is a detail that a person might argue isn’t essential, but I just might fight them over it.
If you’re going to wear a gown that has a train, you should have a bustle. And if you don’t know what a bustle is, it’s a way to gather up the train of a dress that allows for freedom and ease of movement. In other words, a bustle will let you party and dance at your reception without you needing to carry or fuss over your train – or have anyone clothesline you or damage it by stepping on it.
And though some people may hear the word bustle and imagine Cinderella’s stepsisters’ poofy tooshies, I promise bustles can actually be beautiful. Go ahead, book me and find out! They are a specialty of mine and when done properly, they are a lovely feature when done up and invisible to the unknowing eye when your train is down.
BONUS: Day-of Dressing Services
Yes, even though a Coordinator/Planner on your wedding day is essential, Day-of Dressing Services still are as well!
Why both? A Coordinator’s job is to oversee the entire day and to keep everyone on schedule; however, the Dresser’s job is entirely devoted to assisting you with your attire – and your bridal party as well.
Getting everyone ready can be overwhelming and easily feel like a chore or become chaotic, but you won’t have to worry about prepping anything or navigating any last minute fashion-emergencies with me around. I’ll be there with my many tools to assist and rescue in any way I can so that you can just enjoy your time being pampered. After all, one of the best things you can feel on your big day is relaxed.